When Exhaustion Threatens Our Compassion

A few years ago my husband and I had the incredible opportunity to go on a mission trip to Thailand with our church. Our trip was one of the most amazing experiences of my life but the exhaustion that came with it was unlike any I had experienced. Although I had flown previously before that trip I had never flown for a total of 24 hours or to another country that was 12 hours ahead of our schedule. Combining that with walking several miles daily in the most intense humidity I have ever experienced plus the spiritual darkness we encountered was taxing. To make matters more challenging I decided going back to work a few hours after we landed from a 10-day trip was a good responsible decision. I still remember being at the hospital that day wanting to lie down in the fetal position in tears due to the exhaustion I felt and struggling to meet the needs of my patients.

Sweet friend, have you ever been in a state of exhaustion where you felt completely and utterly depleted? Maybe your exhaustion resulted from an illness, a loved one’s addiction, a broken marriage, financial ruins, an arduous job, endless demands of parenting, or the ministry in which you serve. Maybe you are in the thick of exhaustion at this very moment as you read this and you have been telling yourself, I have nothing left to give. Sweet friend, please know you are not alone in your exhaustion struggle.

Over the past several weeks I have felt emotionally, physically, mentally, and even spiritually EXHAUSTED. Numerous evenings I found myself with tears falling from my eyes as I drove home to my sweet boys who lovingly greeted me, and me feeling as though I had nothing left to give. As I faced each day at work with another child/family that needed me to pour into them, help protect/advocate for them, love on them, cry with them I slowly found myself experiencing compassion fatigue. I dreaded hearing my name called, my phone ring, and my pager beep. Some days I could barely keep up with what was needed from me or felt as though all my efforts were without fruit. I felt defeated, discouraged, and utterly depleted. As a Jesus girl and a social worker, I have always prided myself on leaving others better off than I initially found them but sweet friend that becomes near impossible when compassion fatigue sets in and there is nothing left to pour out.

Recently I found myself mulling over the thought of whether Jesus ever experienced exhaustion during His time of ministry; after all, He was part human. Not long after having this recurring question my husband and I were watching an episode of The Chosen and a scene came on where Jesus had spent countless hours healing and ministering to sick/hurting people. At the end of this scene Jesus comes back to the campsite with sweat on his forehead, tired feet, and immediately says “goodnight” to His disciples as He goes to bed. Sweet friend, I am not saying this was 100% from the Bible but at that moment the Lord used that scene to speak to my heart and provide me a breakthrough. Throughout the Bible, we see where Jesus took the time to meet His basic needs with food/water, shelter, and physical rest. But there was another need, a greater need Jesus had during His time of ministry that He made certain He took the time to tend to…spiritual rest and fellowship/prayer with His Father.

Throughout scripture, especially in the gospels, we see where Jesus withdrew from crowds and even His disciples to have intimate time with God. Mark 1:35 tells us “Now in the morning, having risen a long while before daylight, He went out and departed to a solitary place, and there He prayed.” We also see another example of this in Luke 5:15-16, “Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” Jesus knew the importance of this alone time with His Heavenly Father and beautifully exemplified this throughout His time on earth. The fostering of this constant communion was the source of Jesus’ compassion, wisdom, and power. It is how He made decisions, dealt with troubling emotions, the constant demands of His ministry, and nourished His soul. This is also how He taught His disciples and even prepared for death on the cross.

Recently I had to take a hard inventory of my time spent with Jesus over those several weeks of exhaustion and compassion fatigue setting in. What I realized is my devotion time had become almost non-existent and my prayer life had become stagnant. It’s no wonder I was crumbling under the weight of exhaustion and feeling as though I had nothing left to give. Sweet friend, unless we are intentionally carving out intimate time to sit and fellowship with our Heavenly Father to nourish, empower, and fill us we will never truly experience the replenishment we so desperately need and crave. We will continue to struggle while the relationships and ministries we are part of will start to suffer. This time does not have to be fancy or perfectly curated, it just needs us showing up with a willing heart to spend time with a Father who is lovingly and eagerly waiting.